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FLASHBACK

JULY 1998

SUNYOO POV

All my life, it was always me being spoiled. Someone who had a silver spoon or even a golden spoon in my mouth. Everyday, I woke up to people giving me what I want.

And never did anybody say no.

I came from a rich family, we were even richer than the Kims. My mother the daughter of a loan shark, a director, and a businessman. So she mostly provided for us while my dad was a businessman too.

"Chanyoo, when are you going on a business trip? Again? You know, you should spend more time on the kids," dad said as I sat on the floor near dad's office.

"I have to, you know I'm always busy. The maids can always attend to their needs," mom replied as he was looking at mom.

"We're both busy, okay? You know, if you keep spoonfeeding our children like that everyday, they won't be independent," dad replied.

"Don't be scared about that, they'll do just fine. Let Sunyoo study for her upcoming tests, along with her broth-"

"Stop neglecting your children, okay? It's not healthy, and Sunyoo... isn't she too young to be pressured like this?" Dad asked and mom sighed.

"I'm doing this so she'll be ready for the future! Sunyoo needs to be ready to become someone... that could become a powerful woman," mom replied.

"Hey hey, don't listen to them," a calm voice said, and I turned to the person who was smiling warmly at me.

"Play with your brother, okay? I'm here, and I'll teach you too if you need anything," he said and I smiled back before nodding.

He was my twin brother. He and I were always together, and he cared for me a lot, since he was a minute older.

APRIL 2004

"Sunyoo, if you get a 100 on your entrance exam, I'll get you that new phone," mom said and I nodded as she smiled and turned away.

"Hey bub," my dad said as soon as mom walked away, and he smiled before touching patting my hair.

"You seem tired, were you always like this? I'm sorry for always being busy, but I'm free right now," dad said and I smiled.

"I'm fine, and I'll do well on my exams to please everyone, so cheer for me!" I smiled and he chuckled.

"Do well. Your brother went to school early for practice, so you'll be going alone today," dad beamed and I nodded before walking to the car.

-

"Hey Sunyoo, mind if you can post this on your classroom bulletin? This is an announcement, okay?" Kim Seokjin sunbaenim said as he gave me the flyers.

He was beautiful. I guess I could say that after he always talked to me when he met me. If it weren't for him I wouldn't have forgotten all the pressure I felt all the time.

"Sure, thank you... sunbae," I replied as  bowed at him, and he bowed back.

"Let me know if you need anything, alright? By the way, you look pretty with the new haircut," Seokjin smiled before walking away, and I couldn't help but smile at his statement.

He might be one of my strongest crushes right now. And I was in my first year of middle school.

"You like him?" A calm voice asked and I jumped, looking at the figure next to me.

"Oh... hey there," I smiled and he smiled back.

"That's new. You like him, I heard he was bullied. I'm worried for you because you might get involved too," he said and I sighed.

"No I won't. No one would ever dare to mess with me and you know that too!" I replied as I looked at my twin.

"I guess so, but you haven't answered my question. Do you like him?" He asked and I shrugged.

"You guessed it, I guess," I rolled my eyes and he laughed.

"You're all grown up, I wish he'd know how much you liked him," he smiled before patting my back.

But somehow, his touch felt cold. Really cold.

-

"You haven't been eating much, are you sure you're okay?" Dad asked as he touched my brother's forehead.

"I'm fine dad, I'll go now," he replied as he took his bag, hopping off the chair.

"Sunyoo, before you go I'd like to make an announcement for you," mom said as she looked at me.

"What is it?"

"I'm planning on sending you off to Helsinki for highschool," she said and my brother's eyes widened.

"Mom, you can't seperate us like that! Sunyoo can't go to Helsinki alone! Did she ever say she wanted to?" He responded and mom looked at him.

"You should know that you're totally fine studying here. Sunyoo needs extra lessons since she needs it!" Mom replied.

"Chanyoo, don't pressure Sunyoo like that. Try to give her space to think about that," dad said.

Helsinki?

I don't want to go to Helsinki.

"Whatever she says, she'll know it is for her future, right Sunyoo?" Mom asked and I looked down on my lap.

"Wherever Sunyoo goes, I go with her," he says and mom sighs.

"Tell your dad that, and see if he'll let you," mom said as she side-eyed dad.

"That's right. You just need to get used to-"

"When will you stop making plans for me and her without letting us breathe?" He huffed and my parents grew silent.

"I know you've done lots of terrible things, but how terrible can you be to just send you daughter off when she maybe wants to study here? When you're not giving her the time to think?" He said.

"What did I say about,-"

"Mom, I don't care if I'm being disrespectful. You don't control our lives, you can't make these decisions for us," he said.

"You know I'm doing this for your own good, now go to school. I hope both of you will learn to be indpendent, but you just want to scrape each other off until the end," mom furrowed her brows and I bowed a bit before taking my bag, and following my brother.

-

"I hate being controlled," he said as he kicked some pebbles, and I looked at him.

"I know we're both unloved, and we have to do things to become loved. But I hope you know that your brother loves you, right?" He said as he looked at me.

"They say it's bad to be rebellious against your parents, but sometimes even parents can be bad too. And we kids need to stand up for our own," he explained.

"Sunyoo, please don't let people sway you. Don't let anyone tell you what to do, I hope someday I get to see you as someone who knows what they want, and does everything to make it theirs, even if it's not going to happen, atleast you did," he smiled and I nodded.

"You deserve much more, much more than being someone that's being pressured for a path that is not theirs."

"I-I will," I replied and I smiled.

-

My eyes widened as I looked at the figure, jumping off the Han River bridge.

"S-someone... killed themselves."

"Get a ambulance!"

"They drowned themselves in the Han River!"

As they pulled the body out of the river, my jaw hung.

Brother?

At that point, I was to stunned to cry. And all I did was stand and stare at the body of my drenched brother, being carried to the ambulance.

Suddenly, I cried loudly, trying to break free from the restraints the police had on me as I tried to reach my brother.

-

"He's in a better place now, I'm sure he's resting in peace," Seokjin said as he stood beside me.

"I sure hope so, I always.... loved him as my big brother," I sniffed as he looked at me.

"If only... if only if I knew how much he suffered from suicidal depression, this wouldn't have happened," I sobbed and he patted my back.

"I'm... such a useless sister," I said.

"Please, stay strong. You know... I hope you live for your brother too. And I care for you a lot, so don't be sad anymore, your brother won't like it," he said as he stared at me, before turning his heel.

That was the first time I felt loved.

The first time  felt somebody aside from my brother cared for me and gave me concern.

That's why I fell in love too.

2004-  few months after death

"Sunyoo, come down here for a second," dad said as he gestured me to come down and I nodded as I stepped down the stairs.

"I want you to meet someone. And he's a few years older, and I bet you need someone to be friends with since you're feeling lonely and I want you to cheer up," dad said as he pointed at the little boy who was standing infront of the front door.

"Dad, who's that?" I asked, still nervous after what happened to my brother.

"His name is Kim Taehyung, and he'll be working as dad's youngest helper from now on," dad smiled and I tilted my head as I looked at this Taehyung guy.

"Taehyung, this is the Han Sunyoo I was talking about. You both can play with each other if you want to," dad smiled and I looked at Taehyung before nodding.

"Nice to... meet you," Taehyung said as he bowed, and I bowed back.

-

As we walked together in the backyard, asking each other questions and getting to know each other, Taehyung rubbed the back of his neck as he looked at me.

"I have something to ask, if you'e comfortable," Taehyung said as he lookwd at me.

"What is it?"

"What was the name of your brother?"

"His name was....

....Hoseok."

----
(UNEDITED)

A/N:

Vote 🥺

I'M SOS SOSOOSOSOSO SORRY for not updating ><. I just wanna say my phone broke and I couldn't update for about 5 days because I begged my dad to buy me a new phone lol. I spent 2 days exploring my phone and now I decided to update!

(Also, I spent the 5 days completing Penthouse 1 & 2 too lol so im sorry)

Anyways, thank you for being patient and waiting!🖤

Cover by @Jjkookiesandmilk❤