Màu nền Màu tối Mặc định Xám nhạt Xanh nhạt Xanh đậm Vàng nhạt Màu sepia Vàng đậm Vàng ố

Font chữ: Palatino Linotype Bookerly Segoe UI Patrick Hand Times New Roman Verdana Tahoma Arial

Chiều cao dòng: 100 120 140 160 180 200

Kích cỡ chữ:

FLASHBACK

NAMJOON POV

"First place, Kim Namjoon!"

"The 1st topnotcher for the ESAT exam goes to... Kim Namjoon!"

"First place in the International Physics Test, Kim Namjoon!"

"First in Korea's top 10 outstanding students, Kim Namjoon!"

"Kim Namjoon is one of the top qualifiers to earn a scholarship in Seoul National University and Yonsei University!"

"Kim Namjoon is known to be the nation's smartest student!"

"Namjoon is the only student who has perfected the American English Exam in the whole nation!"

"Thank you for electing me as your class president for the 9th time, I promise I will do better than last year," I said through the microphone as I bowed, and the crowd cheered.

"Namjoon, what's wrong? You don't seem comfortable with your speech, is everything alright?" The teacher asked me as I finished my speech, heading backstage.

"Everything is alright... ma'am. Thank you for your concern," I replied normally as I bowed towards her, and she gives me a worried glance before patting my shoulder.

"Come on now, let's go review for your upcoming exams," she said and I nodded before following her towards the classroom.

-

"Namjoon, someone wants to meet you at the classroom," one of my classmate told me as he passed by with his bag, and I gave him a nod with my stoic expression before walking towards the classroom.

Everything felt dull. Every classmate's face was just the same old dull expression plastered in my mind. Nothing mattered to me except my grades, and the amount of recognition and leaderships I get.

I walked towards the classroom and I sighed deeply as I saw the lights were still on. It was after class and we had to go to self-study classes.

Crap, I'm going to be late for it because of this too.

I groan softly before pushing the door open, and I looked around. No one was around, only the faint sounds of students' footsteps were heard and I tightened my jaw as I lifted my glasses up.

Is this just a prank? It's not funny.

"U-uh... Namjoon?" A voice called and my eyes widened as I suddenly turned towards the person infront of me, standing beside me as she faced me.

"Oh... hello, may I help you?" I reply and she looks at me before diverting her gaze on the floor.

"Uhm.... you're the class president of this class right? I'm your junior, and I have something to say to you," she said as she looked down, the dim light covering her face.

"Yes? And that is....?" I replied as I stared at her from top to bottom.

"Namjoon sunbae, I like you! I like you a lot!" The girl said and I gave her a look as if I didn't even hear anything. Everything was heavy and it felt like nothing really shifted inside of me.

Who cares if no one likes you, Namjoon? Who cares if someone likes you?

"What's your name?" I asked and she raises her head before maintaining eye contact with me.

"Park Joo-Il, sunbae," she replied as she bowed again.

"I'm sorry. But I don't feel the same way. In fact, I never felt anything about you," I said, maintaing my stoic expression as I looked at her, and her eyes widened as she stared at me a for a few seconds.

"O-oh.... would you care to think about-"

"I said what I said. I don't want to return any feelings I never had. I don't even think I have feelings. I don't care about anyone's feelings at all," I said before staring back at her, and she nods slowly.

"Y-yes sunbae. Th-thank y-you... so much!" She said before bowing once again, looking at me before she heads towards the door.

-

"Namjoon! You were born, you were raised to be a leader, a genius! Everyone knows that! You should know that!" Dad said as he smiled at me grabbing my shoulders as I looked up at him.

I looked up at him. Nothing sparked inside of me anymore. The first time he said those words were like the words of someone who was encouraging me to do better, to strive as a person who has lots of worth. But now, it seemed like an everyday chore.

I looked at my brother as he had his broad back faced on me, he was watching the television, and something grew in my chest, and I bit my lip as I looked at him.

Is he really that good for me? That he won't even study hard just like me?

I will surpass you soon.

"Namjoon, you know we're doing this because we love you, right? You're the one who needs to try hard, okay?" Mom said as she approached me, caressing my cheek as she gave me warm smile.

Then, that feeling disappeared. And everything was replaced by a thought that always revolved in my mind.

Yeah... I'll ace everything. Because they love me.

ONE YEAR LATER

"Did you hear? Namjoon placed second in his entrance exams! And it was in his third year of high school! What a shame he didn't get the gold!"

"Who knows what his teachers would probably think of him, and to think everyone expected him to become first like always!"

I groaned as I made my way inside the company. My dad wanted me to go to the office and I obeyed. I made my way to the elevator as I pressed the buttons, entering it before making my way to the top floor.

The doors soon opened, and I stepped outside, making my way to my father's office. I placed my knuckles on the door before creating a small sound against it.

"Come in."

I sighed before pushing the door open, and my eyes plastered onto my father who was sitting on a chair, his hand laced together as he stared at me with no emotion.

"Sit," he said and I nodded before making my way to the seat, sitting myself down.

"I see you've gotten second in your entrance exams. What's gotten into you?" He asked and I bit my lip before replying.

"I-I'm sorry! I-I-,"

"That's the least of my problems right now. What will happen if you become the CEO and people will go around talking dirty about our name?" He said and I looked at him, a sudden pain jutting on my chest.

"C-CEO? O-of what? Your heir? What about hyung?!" I asked and he glanced at me.

"Your brother could be a qualified heir. But in the business world, we pick the ones who stand out the most, it brings out the best in our sales and the success of the company, and you are the embodiment of that!" He explained and I looked at him.

"C-CEO... I don't want to be CEO!" I said.

"What do you mean?! Without the company you're nothing! Look at your brother! He obeys everything! I don't get why you're rebelling so much Namjoon!" My dad argued.

"Seokjin hyung this, Seokjin hyung that! You're making it seem like he's better than me when you keep saying I'm worthy! Have I even gotten the love I deserved?! The love you said you'd give me as a son?!" I ranted and his eyes widened.

"I consider you as a son! I always did! And as a son, you are worthy of being my next heir! It's what your mom wants!" He argued back.

"You're being brainwashed by my mother! You're the one who should decide and not her!" I said.

"You dare say about your mother you brat! You're so ungrateful! I can't believe it!" He replied.

"I am an ungrateful brat! What I strongly think is what I am going to obey! I don't care about anyone's feelings! I want to grow on my own! I want to make money on my own!" I replied.

"Then go! Get away! All that prepping you to be a leader for nothing!"

Those words hit like a stab at my chest, and I stood up, grabbing my bag before exiting the room, walking over to a small room near the office before entering it. It was dark and no one was there.

I slid down the door, closing my eyes as a sob came out from my mouth, liquid flowing down my cheeks and I hugged my legs before letting it all out. The pain mentally and physically hurting me.

No one understands. You'll never understand.

Why am I crying?

You're supposed to be strong. Stop.

Stop.

stop.

And ever since then, I chose to stay away from the people I loved.

-----
(UNEDITED)

A/N:

Vote or you will get soap in your eyes

I'm sorry this was late! Anyway, I wanted Namjoon to be a character that everyone wants to know about more, since he's important in the book!

Cover by: @deniana_sky❤

SEND MORE COVERS! @sujinniie on INSTAGRAM! YOU BETTER SEND THEM 🔪🔪🔪